Monday, December 29, 2008

The Great Debate.

For those of you who don't know, I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). And 6 months ago, I finally got married. So therein begins the great kid debate. Shawn and I decided before we ever got married that if we have kids fine, if we can't, then that's ok too, and we laid out exactly what measures we were willing to take if things don't happen naturally.

The thing is... I don't know if I want to have kids. At times I do, but at times I really don't. I've always kind of let myself hang in the middle there, so that I wouldn't be too let down if I can't have kids.

The part of me that wants the kids, just wants to get it over with, I want to be a relatively young mom. I want to do the preg thing and be done with it, I don't forsee myself as being one of those women who will enjoy pregnancy and glow with it. I'm also hoping that if I do get pregnant then my body will normalize itself somewhat, and I won't have as many annoying "symptoms" of PCOS.

The part of me that doesn't want the kids says that I want to finish school first. That's going to be another 3 years at least though because of my work/class situation. This part is the part that doesn't want to get her hopes up in case I can't get pregnant. The point of the whole so serious post is that, it's been 6 months. Since we've started trying. So now, I'm going to try and embark on a "lifestyle" change to be healthier so I can get pregnant (maybe) and stay that way and be a healthier me.

If this isn't enough weight to motivate me to lose some of it. I don't know what is.

Monday, December 22, 2008


What do you do if you accidentially honk your horn while stopped at a red light on a two lane road with lots of traffic? Pretend to wave to someone? Wave and mouth "I'm sorry?"

4 degrees is too cold. This is not Canada.

Friday, December 19, 2008

Don't Hate the Dork.

I am officially a huge dork, and have started studying for a class before it has commenced. I don't ever want to be that close to not passing again. So sue me. I guess I'm allowed to be dorky, considering I'm adult and all.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Deep Thoughts...

The wait is over. I have passed freshman chemistry, again. 10 years later. I don't know if i could be so excited and so utterly disappointed in myself at the same time. I was about to change my major from microbiology into something easier, like business. I think some part of me would have felt like I was taking the easy way out instead of toughing through this and proving the ultimate point to myself.

I often wonder if when I graduate if I will feel any different. Will I finally be at peace with myself for making so many mistakes in the past? I intend on making a post to inform my vast readership of my history with college and why all of this freshman chemistry retakingness is so ludiacris, but that will just have to come at a later date.

1. Definitely very funny that the 1st face transplant happened in Cleveland.
2. Every single time I remember to turn on the Steelers, it's the 4th quarter and it's a nail-biting end.
3. Cats ruin Christmas trees and plants. I am Captain Obvious.
4. Why is it that at work beer sounded so good, but at the bar, tasted icky?
5. It's icy out, but not icy enough for a snow day. There is no Santa.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Poor me.

If anyone knows what I did, kharma wise, to deserve getting sick for finals. Please respond. At least then I'd have something to blame it on.

I have not had a cold for the ENTIRE 3 years that I have lived in Columbus and I get sick two days before a final I HAVE to pass? Seriously?

Ugh. I'm off somewhere napping, dreaming of hybrid orbitals and trig functions in a nyquil induced coma. Wish me luck.

Sunday, December 07, 2008


Dear Ohio State,

Due to the fact that I've been in school, one or the other, for the past 10 years, I think that I have enough credits as well as life experience to earn a bachelors degree. I don't know if you realize or not, but they let me crossmatch blood to transfuse. INTO people, in which if it was the wrong type, they would DIE. Please forward my completed transcript to my home address. Thanks.


Monday, December 01, 2008


On Wednesday, I got out of work a little early and decided that I needed to find a few new outfits to wear for the Thanksgiving holiday. Now it is no secret that I am not skinny. I even think lots of people would call me fat, but usually I can find clothes still in normal stores. However, the last 10 lbs I've put on since the wedding have pushed me over into the Lane Bryant range. I HATE shopping at Lane Bryant. I call it the fat people store, sorry if that is offensive, but I am qualified to say so, if you know what I mean. Fat people, apparently, are supposed to be gifted in the chest region and I am just not, so that makes finding clothes in there a challenge for me.

So there I am, perusing around LB with a friend of mine and we are amazed at the amount of rhinestones that one store can contain. Isn't that against the fire code or something? Don't let the sun shine in or there will surely be a fire. My friend noted that it looked like someone with a bedazzler got drunk and went to town.

I manage to find two shirts that don't have rhinestones on them, and since they were having a bogo sale, I decided to try on some jeans. They do not have regular sized jeans at LB, they have sizes 1-8 in three different fits, straight hips, curvy, and fat ass. Is the whole size 1-8 thing supposed to make me feel any better? I just don't get it. I don't even want to know what size I really was in. Carrot sticks here I come. The other odd thing I was amazed by was all of the UGLY patterns that abounded. I mean really, if it is ugly on a beanpole person, do you really thing ENLARGING it is going to make it better? I don't think so. So two shirts and two pair of jeans later, I got some nice clothing, but I am definitely ready to go back to the regular stores. I will use the bedazzler as motivation while I'm on the elliptical every morning next week.